Project Goosebumps: Book 8: The Girl Who Cried Monster

Project Goosebumps: Book 8: The Girl Who Cried MonsterThe Girl Who Cried Monster (Goosebumps, #8) by R.L. Stine
Series: Goosebumps #8
Published by Scholastic Paperbacks
Pages: 144
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1 Stars

She's Telling the Truth... But No One Believes Her!
Lucy likes to tell monster stories. She's told so many that her friends and her family are sick of it.
Then one day, Lucy discovers a real, live monster: the librarian in charge of the summer reading program.
Too bad Lucy's told so many monster tall tales.Too bad no one believes a word she says.Too bad the monster knows who she is......and is coming after her next.
Reader beware-you're in for a scare!

*Deep Breath*

Where to even bloody begin.

*Rubs eyes tiredly and sighs*

This is by and far the WORST attempt at a monster book I have ever read. And I read a lot of monster books. Horror is my thing, it’s what I do. If you don’t believe me check out the Redshirts Blog next week for my week long Friday the 13th horror spectacular. This is not a monster book. This defies categorisation, and it has made me so damned angry!

I can fly through a Goosebumps book in under 90 mins and be happy, I was making good time reading the series and then this shit show happened *Nemo looks at archer warningly about cussing… He’s too angry to care at the moment*. It took me 2 bloody weeks to read this crap, why? Because it was so bloody boring that it actually hurt my head to read it. I found myself actually reading the dictionary in Spanish to avoid reading this, it was so dull.

It should’ve been better. It should’ve been a great hidden world horror tale for kids. but it wasn’t. It was 137 pages of “am I imagining it?” “Am I really seeing a monster or is my imagination running away with me?”…. Long story short kid, you’re not imagining it.

Our protagonist, Lucy, loves telling monster stories and because of that no one believes her… Not because she’s 12 and is screaming she’s seen a monster… But because she see’s them that often no one believes her any more. Right OK, I can live with that. But it turns out the monster is real and she can’t convince anyone. SHe hass to actually get her friend to witness it so he can tell her parents so they’ll believe her. And precious little happens in the book. You see the monster eat some flies and a turtle, a little bit gross but not too far of a push for kids. And then the parents invite the monster for dinner…

THAT MAKES PERFECT SENSE!!!!
THAT MAKES PERFECT SENSE!!!!

The twist of Lucy and her family also being monsters ALMOST makes up for it, almost. It would do far better if earlier on in the book Lucy hadn’t been told repeatedly by her parents that there are no monsters. The writing is up to Stines usual calibre for this age range but it just feels like he phoned this one in with no real clue where he was going with the story. It was a contractual obligation compared to something you can feel he enjoyed writing. I cannot, in good conscience, recommend anyone read this book because it was so dissatisfying.

People had told me this was a good one, but honestly, I read nearly 40% of book 9 of the series after this in one sitting before bed, and will probably finish it during my lunch break today. That is a good monster book for kids. Not this pile of horse crap. Just put it down… compost it…. use it for book art…. anything but read it. It’ll just make you sad and angry.

Please do not let this become a trend for this series.

Archer
Archer

About Archer

Cleverly disguised as a responsible adult, I will devour pretty much anything that can hold me. Outside of that I’m a keen amateur photographer, a serious gamer and a keen cook.

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2 thoughts on “Project Goosebumps: Book 8: The Girl Who Cried Monster

  1. Michelle @ Pink Polka Dot Books

    I know I’ve already said this, but I LOVE that you guys are having this Goosebumps thing on your blog 🙂 R.L. Stine is one of my author heroes… and even though a lot of his stuff doesn’t hold up to what I thought of it growing up, I don’t even care. I’ll never forget the joy I got out of reading his books as a kid.

    I wasn’t the biggest Goosebumps reader, so it’s funny to see the reactions here 🙂

    1. Archer

      Y’know, for the most part they do hold up, especially as kids books.

      But not all of them are gems. And there are some that are faaaaar better than others.

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